Friday morning, I woke up around 8. With a yawn, I blinked groggily at Flynn, who was still sleeping. I eased slowly away from him, so as not to wake him. Surprised to hear the babies were still asleep, I stood to look at everyone, to make sure everyone was alright.
I froze. The chair was empty. Jase wasn't behind the alarm clock. The babies were gone. Clapping a hand to my mouth and my other to my stomach, I ran to the printer, scrabbled up onto it, and asked Merida if the kids were up there.
Merida shook her head, confused, and I gasped.
"They're..they're gone!"
"Och, no!" Merida jumped up. Her legs gave out on her, and she nearly fell. I leaned over and grabbed her arm to keep her from plummeting off of the shelf. She jumped back up and woke Rayne and Blondie. "Get Flynn and we'll start searching for them! Maybe they got stuffed in a drawer or something."
I hurtled back over and flung myself down by Flynn, shaking his arm urgently and saying his name until he woke.
"Good morning, sweethear-what's wrong?" He had started to come in for a kiss, but froze when I jerked away from him.
"They're gone!" I managed.
"Who's gone?" He was awake and alert now.
"They are!" I gestured towards the empty shelf, and he pushed past to see for himself.
"Get down here and help us root through these drawers!" I yelled frantically, yanking on a handle with all my might. Falling backwards onto the chair, I thought about how mean that had sounded. "Please. Flynn, please come and help us root through these drawers. I'm sorry." I crawled into the drawer and almost lost myself in amongst mounds and mounds of papers - the drawer Tangled Fan kept her finished drawings in. I shuffled through and around piles, and they weren't in here. Flynn was working his way quickly amongst the other drawers, helping Merida, Rayne, and Blondie; and we made quick work of all six of the drawers.
Merida, Rayne and I left for the 18 inchers' dresser to go through those drawers, which held clothes (human clothes - not their clothes.) No sign of them there, either, and it had taken us forever to go through them all!
I was trying to keep from crying, but when Merida and Rayne hugged me as we walked back to the shelves, I almost broke down completely. A few tears dropped, and I could tell both Merida and Rayne were devastated as well. They were such good friends. I thanked them for helping, and dejectedly wandered up to Flynn.
He saw me coming on the 'deck', and looked so hopeful. Like an excited little kid.
I dreaded telling him we hadn't found them.
I was biting my lip as I walked up to him. He saw my face and his crumpled before he could keep his composure.
Just then, Tangled Fan came walking into the room.
"Where are they?" I yelled.
"Where are-oh. I didn't think you were planning on adopting any of them."
"Where are they?" I repeated, through my teeth.
"Janet and Allie were adopted out. I'm planning on someone coming to adopt Hallie tomorrow."
"J-Jase?" I asked.
"Goodwill bag. Sorry, I didn't realize.." She stopped. "The Goodwill bag...Oh no! I think it's gone!" She tore out of the room.
I dropped to my knees, balled up, and sobbed.
I heard Flynn walk up to me. "I'm so..sorry...I-I should've told her we wanted to adopt them..and n-now they're g-g-gone!" I sobbed. I didn't realize how much I'd really come to love those four little girls.
Flynn gathered me up in his arms. "Shh. It's okay. Maybe she'll find Jase and those other dolls won't adopt Hallie, and at least we can still have those two."
He carried me to the shelf, sat down,and held me on his lap. I felt like a seven year old, but I didn't care. The dam finally broke and I cried hard. Sobs wracked my body and Flynn held me close, rocking from side to side, with his head pressed up against my head. I felt my hair get wet.
I pulled away and looked at him. He wouldn't meet my eyes, but I saw his were red-rimmed.
I put my hand on his. "I'm so sorry...I c-can't believe...I can't-" He pulled me back in as I started to cry more.
"I'm sure we'll be able to adopt others." He whispered. "Everything happens for a reason, honey. It's not your fault. You didn't know that this was going to happen."
I pulled away again, but he still kept his arms loosely around me. One look told me he didn't quite believe the words he was saying, either. He tried to offer a brave smile, but it didn't do a thing, and his smile was shaking.
Suddenly, I realized that this might've happened with Flynn if his migraine hadn't stopped. I would've woken up and he would've been gone. Just like I'd woken up and found the shelf empty.
I leaned back into his chest, and just sat there, trying to calm myself. My tears were all gone eventually, but I still felt awful and hollow.
I loosed a shaky sigh, and I went to wipe my tears. Flynn cupped my cheeks with his hands, and whispered that everything would be okay.
"But what if everything isn't okay?" I stared at him.
"It just will be." He pulled me in again into a tight hug, but then he must've glanced at the alarm clock. "Might as well go get some sleep now." He stood and I did, too, and he was starting towards bed.
I snorted. "Sleep? Right."
He wheeled around towards me. "Your attitude won't help the situation, miss. I miss them, too, and I'm trying to be here for you, but you're making it awfully hard."
"Then don't be! Don't worry about little old me, who has an attitude. Nobody in our situation would be a little bit pessimistic, anyway."
"I didn't say-"
"And how on earth do you expect me to not be mad or upset or anything? My children just got taken away from me!"
"Rapunzel, wait up a second. I just-"
I held a hand up. "I'm going up to see Merida."
He called my name, but I just turned away and started walking.
Suddenly, he grabbed my arm and pulled me to face him.
"Let me go." I growled.
He looked slightly shocked, but he tightened his grip. "I don't want to start a fight, not ever, and not now. I'm sorry. It's just that I'm trying to keep an optimistic outlook, and I'm trying to keep you from worrying, too."
He slightly loosened his grip on my arm, and I considered jerking away from him. But he looked close to tears, and I could hear it in his voice. "And I just want to say this - We're at the stage where we might try to start blaming others for what happened, when we really know it was Tangled Fan. And if that happens, I refuse to fight with you or blame you for any of this. You can hate me or whatever all you want, but I won't. I just need you to know that I'm just trying to be here for you, and be the faithful husband I should be."
"Did I say I hated you?" I started to bristle.
"No. I'm just saying that I'll be here for you. Even if you do end up thinking stuff like that. Just listen, honey."
I heard his honest attempt at being cordial right now and wondered how he could be.
I nodded, taking a deep breath to try to cool the hotness in my throat, and he continued. "It just gets a little hard when you're trying to keep an optimistic outlook, and the person you're trying to keep optimistic...isn't being optimistic. I'm sorry I made that crack about your attitude. It just...I just lost my cool for a minute. And it just takes one sentence, one minute, to ruin a relationship. I don't want that. Baby, I so don't want that."
He was in tears. I felt terrible for starting all this. He loosened his grip on my hand and let it go. "But if you feel better going to talk things over with Merida, I understand."
"No. I'm sorry. You need me as much as I need you right now." I tried to suppress a sob. I wished I could have held in my sarcasm and pessimism. I pressed my hands on my eyes and squeezed them shut, trying to convince the tears welling in my eyes to go away. "I'm so, so sorry. I miss them so much." I gasped.
He stepped over and grabbed me into a tight embrace. "It's okay. I miss them too."
I let out a cry at how forgiving the poor guy was...I'd been plain mean and he still tried to comfort me.
He was crying openly, too - his whole body was shaking with sobs.
I took my hands away from my eyes and wrapped him in my arms. "Hon..I'm sorry...I'm so sorry...you're right - they'll be okay....maybe we'll...we'll wake up tomorrow a-a-and find them all here again...maybe this's j-just a dr-dream." I couldn't catch my breath without sobbing.
He put one hand on my head and held me so tightly I could hardly breathe. He pressed his own head up against my hair and I could tell he was trying to calm himself down.
Finally, after I don't know how long, Flynn suddenly loosened his grip. He started to tilt backwards. He was fast asleep! How on earth could he DO that?? I grabbed frantically at him, and at least managed to ease his fall - I ended up being dragged down as well. When he hit the shelf, he jolted awake.
"You fell asleep. Sorry, but I don't think I can carry you..." I tried to joke, but failed sorely.
He sat up and I curled up against him. It was actually chilly, compared to our more recent muggy weather. I pressed as close to Flynn as I possibly could. I just felt like I needed to hold onto something that I knew - or at least, I really hoped - that nothing would happen to. And I think we both fell asleep that way.
Why did Tangled Fan take our foster kids?? I mean, I get that we hadn't full-out adopted them, but still. Ask as person before you take them all away! Rather...ask a DOLL before you take their foster dolls away. We have feelings, too - imagine if she had kids that were taken away from her! She wouldn't like it much, either, I bet.
So I'll keep you guys updated best as I can...I'm sure Flynn will have a hot and enraged post up sometime..and he's surely entitled to it, between my behavior and Tangled Fan! Poor guy.
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